20+ Fresh Tweet Treats For Your Eyes to Consume

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Brad Dickson • Managing Editor
Oct 11, 2022 1:30 PM EDT

After all these years, Twitter has never lost that chaotic element that has always made it so uniquely horrifying to me. I've never been a huge contributor to the platform myself - partly owing to the fact that my 0 followers would have me throwing thoughts into a void, but I've never quite found a way to establish any sense of a community on the platform. Everything is outwards flowing due to the very nature of a 'tweet', and in a world where zingy one-liners, drama, and persecution are king, I've never found a way to find the engaging discussions and shared interests that I usually use social media for. 

Another thing about the platform is that I know absolutely no one who uses it (at least anyone who admits it publicly); Yet, it continues to grow its user base, claiming 237.8 million users in Q2 of '22. Who are all these mysterious Twitter users? And why are none of them in my circle?

But, of course, since zingy one-liners are king, Twitter remains a great place to harvest them. So, enjoy this collection of fresh Tweets hot off the press.

For more funny tweets after this, check out this recent collection.

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  • 01
    Sky - charlie @chunkbardey · 14h well it's 11am. the day is over 23 4,082 55.2K (→
    via Funny Tweets
  • 02
    Sky - Sim U @WhoTFissim · 12h Letting her be the passenger princess cause I care about my safety >>>> 276 13.8K 91K ←]
    via Funny Tweets
  • 03
    World - IG: closedapp @ih8rts 16h bro where tf my vape at 428 11.5K 83.7K <]
    via Funny Tweets
  • 04
    Human - The Notorious J... @whotfisjo.... 12h stop normalizing the grind and normalize whatever this is 31.5K 187.2K
    via Funny Tweets
  • 05
    Food - k @yaitskayy 12h scrambled eggs for breakfast 745 13.1K 103.3K ‚↑
    via Funny Tweets
  • 06
    Facial expression - Luis Vercetti @97Vercetti. 12h jeffrey dahmer 148 10.5K 68.9K
    via Funny Tweets
  • 07
    Font - OKLAHOMA WILDLIFE CONSERVATION Oklahoma Departm... @O... 14h Be diligent and check your child's candy this year, just found an invasive silver carp shoved inside a Milky Way. No words. ALT 542 11.1K 69.7K
    via Funny Tweets
  • 08
    Product - Ben Taylors... @BenTaylors.... Oct 9 What a touching way to remember Her Majesty 486 G EN KE PLATE G 14.8K 157.3K HAFEL took BS ←]
    via Funny Tweets
  • 09
    Sky - bad bih bible... @realmainfeel.... 10h burning sage & my mama talm bout, "I can't I bet you can't demon breathe". 10.6K 345 76.7K ↑
    via Funny Tweets
  • 10
    Sky - ALNE @uglygod_geno 11h As an employee you should take all 55 minutes of your 30 minute lunch break 7,361 89 46.4K
    via Funny Tweets
  • 11
    Sky - MOOD bf: is that my shirt? me: it used to be @ITSMOODYAF. 10h 196 12.5K 74.3K <]
    via Funny Tweets
  • 12
    Personal computer - Shafeeq @Y2SHAF 12h me googling the number that called me instead of answering it like an adult 86 11.6K 55.6K <]
    via Funny Tweets
  • 13
    Vertebrate - 2 ENG Josh Weller @joshweller Oct 10 My mum just called the old man in Pinocchio 'Chiptole'. Then she corrected herself, and called him 'Gestapo'. 425 10.3K 171.8K
    via Funny Tweets
  • 14
    Organism - SCAM GODD... @Diva.... Oct 10 My flight was delayed a few times, the pilot just got on and apologized and said "Don't worry about the time folks we're gonna fly this thing like we stole it." 869 26K 423.8K
    via Funny Tweets
  • 15
    Organism - A David Stas... @davidsta.... Oct 10 You cannot spoil House of Dragons for me because I do not know anyone's name. 9,016 457 108.4K
    via Funny Tweets
  • 16
    Sky - brandon* @brndxix Oct 10 it's 2022 can we please stop “pranking" retail workers 283 15,104 98.6K
    via Funny Tweets
  • 17
    Font - Blue Eyes... @BlueEyed.... Oct 10 POV: Your homie jumped into the Twitch Con foam pit 194 1 9,958 147.8K
    via Funny Tweets
  • 18
    Organism - Lins @Lins_1983 Oct 10 Today, whilst out shopping, I tried on a beautiful jacket. It was the jacket of a customer trying on another jacket and now I can never go shopping again. 5,296 1,295 130K ←]
    via Funny Tweets
  • 19
    Sky - bad bih bible... @realmainfeel... 10h i can deal with a lil corny here and there, but when you on the cob, that's where i draw the line 131 7,576 26.6K ↑
    via Funny Tweets
  • 20
    Sky - MIA @miacsosa · Oct 10 never been kissed under the cameltoe or whatever it's called 110 2,871 23K
    via Funny Tweets
  • 21
    Cartoon - IG: closedapp @ih8rts Oct 10 me watching y'all party every weekend. 21 5,941 26.4K ←]
    via Funny Tweets
  • 22
    Sky - M @babyariees Oct 10 the worst thing you can do while cleaning is sit down for a minute 53 ● 2,364 23.9K
    via Funny Tweets

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